Where Did I Fail as a Mom?
If you are a mom of young children and even adult children, the truth is....you have asked yourself this same question. And probably more than once.
Your child makes bad choices and you think to yourself, "where did I go wrong?"
We had more control over them as toddlers. Or so we thought. Your toddler makes a bad choice, then the consequences matched the offense. And viola a changed behavior!
Not so much with adolescent and adult children. I mean how do you stick a fourteen, sixteen, and twenty year old in time out? Or drive them over to another church families home to return a stolen toy and apologize for being sneaky? Yes, that actually happened when one of my boys was 7 years old. It was more painful for me than him. That tells you a lot about me. Yuck!
Now that they are older I am finding that it is harder to reign in a wayward heart. I seem to forget that I was fourteen, sixteen, and twenty at one point and I was wayward too. I mean if I am honest, I am wayward today. My stubborn heart wants what it wants and NOW!
Don't we all get off the path sometimes?
This morning as I was in the shower I was having one of those moments where I was just berating myself. Thoughts like..."you should have made all of them go to church camp. You should have never given them a phone. You shouldn't have put a TV in their rooms. You should have kept reading the Bible to them at night before they went to bed. You should have demanded that they get in a Bible study. You should have created community with other families with children their age....." On and on. The darts kept coming and piercing my already fragile heart.
Until all of a sudden I remembered a word I read in my quiet time just hours before.
"I have surely seen the affliction of my people...I am aware of their suffering...I have come down to deliver them...I have seen the oppression..." Exodus 3:7,8
This was God speaking to Moses but it applies today.
WE HAVE ONE WHO MAKES ALL THINGS RIGHT.
And his name is Jesus!
Even on my BEST MOM DAYS, I am a sinner....I can never save myself...I am an absolute moral and spiritual failure without Jesus.
If I am going to take God at his word, then I must believe that HE SEES, and HE DELIVERS...and "HE WILL BRING THEM UP from that land to a land flowing with milk and honey." He is in the business of moving us from oppression to flourishing, from death to life, from stoney stubborn hearts to a tender responsive heart. A new way of doing things...His spirit in us.
He does it regardless if I send them to a church camp or not, or if they read the Bible before they go to bed or not.
Do you believe God is sovereign? Do you believe He is able to fill in the gaps? Do you believe that nothing can thwart His plan?
Then let Him take the burden of being the BEST MOM off your shoulders. Let His hands take the basket of approval from you. Call to Him and He will rescue you and answer you and give you His spirit like a mighty rushing water over you!!
I relieved his shoulder of the burden,
His hands were freed from the basket.
You called in trouble, and I rescued you;
I answered you in the hiding place of thunder;
I proved you at the waters of Meribah.
Psalm 81:6-7
This is what I felt this morning as I stood in the shower. A mighty rushing water over me. His life sacrificed for me. His spirit poured over me...Not accusing but rescuing!
I may do things a million different ways than other moms. But I can trust that my personality, my strengths and weaknesses, my personal story, my bruises, my scars...are all being used to reach the heart of these three sweet boys God has placed in my life.
Don't be the BEST MOM!
Be the Mom God has created you to be.
Today I release my boys! Don't be the BEST BOYS!
Be the boys God has created you to be!
Comments